As I've seen pictures of me and my dad, I've remembered a girl who desperately longed for her Daddy's approval. . . always seeking to win his heart, praying for 20 years for God to save his soul.
I've seen pictures of my precious Papa who I wish was still here with me.
I've come across 2 young pups on a cruise celebrating 5 years of marriage.
I've seen a hair piece Ash used to carry around, hats she wore when we had to shave her head.
I've seen Alec's silky blanket he loved to hold onto (he still has a silky pillow that he keeps in his bed at night. . .shhh!!!)
Oh the books. . . books galore. . .lots unread. . . made me wonder what I was thinking when I bought them. . . a common thread was . . . JOY.
I've seen pictures of a happy man who once had his mind intact. My heart broke a little as I remembered my precious father-in-law for who he was/is.
I've seen pictures of Disney. . . one at Hoop-dee-doo Review when I got pulled up on stage and got all dressed up as a can-can girl. Good, fun times. Our friends, the Brisendines, were with us that trip. I remember dishing out strawberry shortening for my family and then all of the sudden one of the stars from the show came and grabbed me and told me "to come on, it would be fun. My kids would love it." He was right :)
I've seen a much, much younger me. . . would I go back and trade my forehead lines for how I've grown in the Lord ----- no way. Give me my forehead lines and my growth in Him any day.
I've come across countless prayer journals. I'm so glad I take the time to do that. Not easy when you live at the pace of 0 to 90 as soon as your alarm goes off. . . but thankful. Some of the monsters I still battle with . . . thankfully not as much. . . but they still rare their ugly heads.
One thing made me chuckle. . . I came across a letter to President George Bush (there goes my whole "think I can change the world" mindset **grin**) I had written to encourage him. I guess I never sent it. . . always such good intentions. . .but that whole follow through thing gets me every time.
I came across countless and countless Bible studies. Oh how thankful I am to the Lord for saving me and keeping me.
I came across a Joy Jar from an old friend. I read every.single.paper. I think there were at least 30. Made my heart smile big . . . a very sweet and thoughtful gift.
I came across when my friends threw me a surprise party for my 30th. They had a "who knew Michele the best" questionnaire. What a sweet memory. Jon cleaned the house ferouciously that day. He had given me that as a Christmas present. I took the kids to meet my mom. When I pulled up in the driveway Jon met me outside. He said he had something to show me inside. I asked him did he get me a new comforter (I'd been wanting a new one for our bed). We walked inside and "SURPRISE" . . .everyone jumped out.
I came across pictures of sweet Alec, his boyish hair and chubby cheeks. Now, when I look up at him, I see a young man.
In my digging, as I remembered and remembered, it made me so thankful for this blog. . . made me want to jot down something every day . . .even if it goes like this:
Woke up - such a blessing I take for granted way too much
Hearing my girls tell me they love me out of the blue. - Both did that today and at separate times.
Having Alec apologize to me this afternoon with a hug (rare for him) for being a grouch this morning.
Morning "I love you" texts.
Lunch with Granddaddy.
Walmart with kids and Granddaddy.
Home for a little bit to work on a real estate contract.
Watching the girls on the hammock . . . wishing I had my camera to capture what my eyes beheld.
Seeing my boy cut both our yard and Gigi and Granddaddy's yard today.
Talking to my mama in the morning.
Texting my friends.
Talking to BOTH Melissa and Kristen the same day.
Cooking spaghetti.
Watching Biggest Loser.
Trip down memory lane.
Getting ready for yard sale.
Hugs from Jon.
More hugs from Jon.
Seeing Hanna ride her bike through the yard. Love watching her hair fly in the wind.
So, so, so much stuff to part with. Reminding myself I am only a pilgrim here.
Missing days when kiddos were smaller.
Grateful for the fun and enjoyment and JOY I have with them now. I'm in such a different place. Oh to have the wisdom in my 20s that I have in my 30s. I'm hoping it will only get deeper and better as my forehead lines get deeper too.
Grateful for the fun and enjoyment and JOY I have with them now. I'm in such a different place. Oh to have the wisdom in my 20s that I have in my 30s. I'm hoping it will only get deeper and better as my forehead lines get deeper too.
Jon doesn't like cold either. He stayed in the car while these boys were posing.