Thinking Out Loud

My sweet hubby is downstairs cleaning up the kitchen from our full and busy weekend. While I have a few minutes I thought I'd sit here and blog a little bit.

What a blessing Jon is. . . he's always seeing how he can help me, even if he only has a few minutes to spare. I'm so blessed by him. He's such a wonderful man, husband, and father. Ash has been having a tough time emotionally and with her friends lately. Just about every Sunday and Wednesday she comes home sad or mad. At times I am either sad for her or mad and just want her to get over it and everybody get along. It's so hard when we have big hearts and love big . . . therefore, we get hurt big. Today, the children's choir sang during the service. Ash looked like she was going to bust into tears at any moment. I couldn't wait for that song to be finished. I couldn't wait to wrap my arms around my sweet girl and just love her. (Thankfully nothing was wrong and her big eyes just looked sad because she's so tired). Wednesday night she came home from church in tears. Jon was oh so very sweet and oh so very tender. He just got her to sit in his lap, let her cry, and listened to her spill out her little heart. . . he later told me "sometimes you just need to be loved on". Boy, how I know this and boy how i need to put it into practice. Not only is my man sweet, loving, and tender, but he's so fun. He has now named our family the "Fab 5". We all love it! Alec has been asked to be on a leadership team for our youth at church. They are headed out the door to go to that. Again, he's so sweet at helping me.

What a GREAT weekend we had. Jon and his friend Greg G. went in together and flipped a house and we closed this Friday. It was such a GREAT thing because the lady who bought it is a single mom in our church, and I taught her daughter in Sunday School last year. I was just as thrilled for them as I was for us. Our sweet friends came over for dinner and cards. We are loving play "Hearts" and "Set Back" right now. Jenn G. is such a hoot to watch play cards. She's such a great sport. What a fun night of fellowship we had. . . it didn't end until past 11:00. Jenn said she was about to pull out the sleeping bags. Jon and Greg were looking for more houses to buy. . .so their adrenaline was flowing. She and I, on the other hand, although we loved one another's company. . . we were drifting off fast. She's a mother of six and I had run 18 miles that morning. To say we were both tired is quite the understatement.

Saturday we had a soccer game, then fall festival at church. I love my youth girls so much. Renee had told me she wasn't able to go to "Secret Church" so Shelby wanted to ask me. It made me feel so good and thrilled my heart that she would think of me. BUT, we have a big race this coming weekend, so I can't go. It always feels so good to be thought of.

Saturday evening/night some more friends came over for fellowship and football. We girls sat around the table and talked and laughed! It was such a fun night and GA won!!! Whoop whoop! They beat the gators. I was so happy for Mark Richt. He's such an easy coach to pull for. . . he gave God all the glory. Our night ended with me heading to bed before Faith and Steve left. Faith was so sweet. She would tell me, " I won't think you're rude if you go to bed." I kept dozing off, so i decided to head to my nice bed with flannel sheets.

Speaking of flannel sheets. . . my sweet, sweet Ash. . . so very thoughtful that girl of mine is. With the first cold weather coming in, she surprised me and put my flannel sheets on my bed and made it up and cleaned up my room. Man, I love that girl and I certainly don't deserve to be her mom.

I just love teaching Sunday School. There are times when I think "this is what i was born to do". I just love seeing those girls learn and grow in our Lord. They bless my heart more than they could ever know.

I'm so glad my mom is back in town. I've missed her 7:15 a.m. calls every morning. She called me Sat. and when I told her how much I've missed talking to her she said, "Yeah I know, considering I'm the one who called you, you heifer." Being called a heifer is such a term of endearment in our family.

I'm so grateful for grace. I'm in desperate need of it, and I hope I extended it as freely as I need it.

I have so many posts rumbling through this head of mine. I just need the determination and the time to get them on here.

Better go. We've got church tonight and I need to prepare for discipleship with Lydia in the morning.

Tata for now!

It's 6:00 a.m.

I haven't forgotten about blogging. It seems when I am the busiest, blogging is put to the side. I have oh.so.much to blog about . . .as normal. However. . .

Right now, it is 6:00 a.m. and I AM NOT WORKING, which is what (Mon-Sat) I am always doing. While I'm on the subject of work, for the last 3 years or so I have HATED, DESPISED, and all the other words that go along with those, my job. I dare even say at times I've even been bitter about working. However, as the Lord has given and taken away and given again, my heart has changed. . . I'm actually liking working. I tell Jon that often. I have great bosses (I have 2 typing jobs). The dictators are great and I'm grateful. I think it is our degree of gratefulness that makes a difference in our attitudes towards the things we do or have to do. Even Tuesday as we had lunch with Granddaddy he was thinking about his mother (who is in her 90s and still living). The thing that he admired and thought of her the most was her hard work for her family. Now, I know I'm not on a farm picking cotton or tobacco as she was . . . however my candle does burn at both ends of the night . . . and if this causes my children and husband to "rise up and call me blessed" then I'm grateful. If it doesn't, then I'm grateful as well. Hard work was always stressed in my family, and the fact that for 3 years I HATED it and probably at times made my family miserable with my attitude about my job. . . I'm ashamed of. Praise God for his glorious grace and for Him sanctifying me through and through.

Sorry, I got sidetracked. This is NOT what this post is about. I'm not working, but what I am doing is listening to Veggie Tales. .. WOW! It's been awhile since I've heard that catchy tune playing. . . with an 8, 11, and 14 year old in the house that show no longer captures their attention. I'm here at my little sister's house. .. .3 hours from home. .. . keeping my precious niece Emory. Oh she makes my heart smile. She is adorable, and I'm so thankful to be here keeping her. Kristen has had her 2nd baby. . . Emmett . .. and he is adorable. I think adorable runs in our genes (along with cellulite, but we'll focus on the positives right now, K?) We've come here to keep Emory and do whatever in the world Kristen needs me to do while she is in the hospital. I'm grateful. Pictures WILL be coming SOON! For now, though, I'd better run. Emory is doing the sign (they are teaching her sign language) for "more". . . I think that means she wants breakfast. And, when she takes her nap and I run on the treadmill I will now be singing the song "because I love my duck . .. ." The good 'ole days of "Veggie Tales".

With a grateful heart,

Michele

You Know You are Getting Older When. . .

**after having coffee with a friend, a much younger friend, that you have so much fun together you just don't think about her age. . . after coffee, you get in your van and literally say outloud so only you can hear it, "Well, it's official I'm an older woman instructing a younger woman."

**you realize it is not worth starving yourself to fit into clothes you once wore when you were hungry ALL the time and mean to your kids. I'll take my bigger size and my 10 pounds and niceness over the "skin and bones" look I used to go for.

**you're 11-year-old is becoming a young woman, and when she realizes that she is beginning to look like you. . .and it totally disgusts her. I remember feeling this way about MY mom!

**the highlight of your day is when your dryer gets fixed.

**you've become your mother. It now takes me at least 30 minutes and 1 cup of coffee in the morning before I am capable of doing ANYTHING. . . that includes major things like work or minor things like brush my teeth.

Cupcake Wars - Family Style

Our family loves the show "Cupcake Wars", so when some of our favorite kiddos stayed with us for a few days while their parents went out of town, we decided to play a little bit.

I just LOVE this adorable apron Lisa, Faith, and Jenn. B. got me one year for my birthday. It's almost too pretty to wear. . . seriously.

Melissa came over to help me.

Since eggs may or may not contain salmonella and I couldn't dare risking any of the kids getting sick. . . Melissa and I had to suffer for everyone and eat the batter.

While you're on a sugar high, you might as well keep it and just go for the icing too.

Plus, there were 9 kids in the house. This picture could almost convince you that I actually can cook. . .hee!hee!

Yummy toppingsLook at the icing. . .

Do you see the real butter? Oh yeah, baby!

The girls decided to get creative and add toppings to their batter.

This batter was so full of stuff it was seriously pretty heavy.

Look at how it turned out!!!!! Like a really bad science experiment. It actually tasted quite yummy.

My sweet niece

The boys took a quick break from the video games to join us.

I love, love, love this sweet girl. She makes my heart smile.

I was so proud of these girls. . . after spending 3 days together, they didn't fight once!

Alec was getting uber creative with the rolling pin I bought in Guyana.

The finished products - Noah's cupcakes.

Joseph-Scott's. .. however, his wasn't up for judging, as he was a judge.

Hanna and KJ

Noelle and MaeMae

Alec's cupcakes.

I have no idea where a picture of Ash and Maddie's cupcakes went. Ash actually won the "theme" prize. I can't believe I didn't get a picture. She had a cupcake with a cross drawn on it. It was very pretty.

I guess he's about to dive into it.

Cupcake Crew

Hanna. . . as always, is a MESS!!!!

What the Kids are In To. . .

Hanna. . . is into ALL things girly, girlier, and girliest. See what I mean? She's gotten into my fingernail polish and remover. She's actually getting pretty good at painting her nails.

Ash is into . .Chick-fil-A. . . well, more than the rest of our family. Want to know why? She is experiencing her first crush. Well, I say first crush. . . Benjamin P. has loved her since they were in the church nursery together. However, the 2 only see one another during basketball season. I think she still makes his heart thump. Also, I think Connor went through a short phase when he had a crush on her, but it was probably because they were better friends than anything. These 2 also never seen one another. However, there's a new kid in town and Ash is beyond giddy. . . probably because she is experiencing hormones and she's 11. This boy's daddy is the owner/operator of the Chick-fil-A here in town. For Ash's b-day he came up to her at church and said, "Happy Birthday, here." He gave her a ton of coupons. I told Jon she knows a way to a person in our family's heart -through food. She was giddy. It is all very sweet. However, there's a run coming up that Jon and I help put on and they are both running it. I'm hoping my girl blows him out the water!!!!

Alec is into knives and guns. I guess that's better than being girl crazy. Even today in Sunday School some of my 9th and 10th graders were talking about how shy he is around girls. I seriously was thinking, "You stay away from my boy." But, I didn't. I just smiled and laughed. This it the knife I referred to in a previous post. See why it makes this mama so nervous?

I wish I'd been home doing laundry

So last night we went to a football game to see my niece and nephew play football/flag twirl at halftime. Being a majorette in high school, I absolutely LOVE football games. I was really excited to go, and I was excited because Gigi had told me earlier in the week that Amy (my sister-in-law) was excited as well.

Very rarely do I meet a stranger. I can talk to anyone about anything. I'm warm and I'm friendly and I really do believe everyone that I meet likes me. That's not to sound arrogant, trust me. . . I have tons of insecurities. . .but the things I do well, I'm aware of. . .and being the people lover that I am, I know that I don't have a difficult time with social situations.

All that being said. . .

My brother-in-law, Lee, whom I love like my very own brother, got married 5 years ago to Amy. I was instantly warm, friendly, etc., etc. to Amy. I felt I was very welcoming. . . blah!blah!blah! However, I've never felt she really liked me.

Now, before you start thinking I'm all paranoid and such and needy of needing everyone I meet to like me. . . I know NOT everyone likes me. . . nor do I need for them to. However, at least pretend for me, k? It's not only me who thinks she doesn't like me, Jon sees it and so do other family members.

So, knowing that she was excited about the football game, I sent her a facebook comment letting her know we were excited as well. She responded very nicely. (I was thankful she didn't ignore it).

At the game, however, we were all standing there, and she walks up to everyone, very excited, and speaks to everyone BUT me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It was like I wasn't even there.

Honestly, I was fuming on the inside. I know that is not very Christlike, and I am ashamed of being so feisty. . . but that's how I acted.

I was pretty peeved. I just hate the rejection I feel from her. I've never done anything to her, but be nice. And, if I have done something I want to know what it is, so I can fix it.

Again, its clearly obvious she doesn't care for me.

Jon said he thinks I'm too "sunshiny" for her. That really doesn't matter.

What does matter is my attitude. . .

Which, honestly, was horrible. I was standoffish the rest of the night. The girls and I left at halftime, and I almost didn't say goodbye to her. I did find her and she was very nice when I told her goodbye. But, the whole time I'm fuming about how I've been trying for the last 5 years to be kind to her, to get to know her, etc., etc., and I feel rejected every.single.time. She clearly doesn't like me. The Holy Spirit kept bringing the scripture to my mind found in the Sermon on the Mount (Matt. 5-7) . . ."If you only love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same?" Ouch! I am commanded to love her and to pray for her, which I failed miserably at last night.

I went home and and sought the Lord's grace and repented over my actions and over my heart attitude. I was very much ashamed of how I let my flesh win this battle. I know though that God's grace is greater than ALL my sin, and for that, I'm thankful.