Dear Hanna

Dear Hanna,

Where has the time gone, my sweet love? I just cannot believe that 7 years ago I was holding this little baby in my arms. Now, there is nothing of a baby left in you. I keep telling you that tomorrow morning you're going to wake up and be 5 years old. . . I'm just trying to hold onto to the baby in you. . . because I know the next 7 years will probably fly by even faster than these past 7.

You are such a joy and delight. I just enjoy you so very much. I love how you come and talk to me about whatever is on your little heart and mind as I put on my makeup and fix my hair. Your questions are just precious. Or, how when I am cooking dinner you come alongside me. . . and we just talk . . . or you help me. . . not because you have to, but because you want to. Or, how when we get out of the car and walk in a parking lot to the store, you still automatically grab my hand . . . and we walk hand-in-hand. I just love how easygoing you are.

To hear you pray is one of my favorite sounds in the world. Your pure, sincere heart and your tone of voice makes me smile so big. . . I just can't imagine how our God feels . . . I know how moved I am by it. Serve Him, Love Him, Live for Him my sweet girl!!! When life gets hard and one day it probably will. . . always look to Christ first.

Keep your heart pure. You will have to be very careful to do this. The world will scream at you to forsake your purity of heart. DON'T!!! If your heart is pure, then your actions will resemble that.

I love how you look at your Daddy.. . . how you just have a brightness in your eyes looking at him. I love the excitement in your voice when he walks through the doors coming home from work. I know you will hope to fall in love one day, to be wife, to be a mother . . . but, sweetie, let Jesus be the first love of your life. . . then your husband.

You teach me so very much about being a servant. Whenever I ask you to do anything, you always respond, "Yes m'am" and you immediately go and do it. It doesn't matter what you are doing. . . you stop it and go do what was asked of you. This is a true servant's heart. . . oh, only if your mother could get that down. You teach me, sweet girl. . . so very much, you teach me. I love how you don't complain or grumble because something was interrupted that you wanted to do. You just have this humility about you that I know is from the LORD.

And your gratefulness. . . oh precious child. . . every meal I fix you. . . whether it is a bowl of cereal, a meal you dislike terribly, or a meal that you just gobble up. . . you always thank me for it. You always will go out of your way to find me and say, "Thank you for dinner (breakfast, lunch)." What a sweet, precious heart you have.

Girl, you keep us laughing so much. I'm so very thankful for the gift of laughter. . . and you definitely deliver.

Why in the world God would choose someone like me to have the honor of being your mother I don't know? Grace. . . His grace is the only answer I can come up with. I know it certainly isn't anything I've ever done. I don't deserve you or your brother or sister or your Daddy. . . but I'm so very grateful God has allowed me to have all of you. I love you precious girl. I'm so proud of you! I hope you have a very Happy, Happy 7th Birthday!!!!

With all my love,

Mom

Dear Ashley

Dear Ashley,

Just think 10 years ago today I was holding you in my arms!!! I just can't believe how quickly time flies. It seemed like only yesterday you were sucking your thumb with your finger wrapped around your nose . . . like yesterday we were shaving your head because you were eating carpet. . . like yesterday that I was rocking you to sleep every.single.night. Your room was my favorite room in the house. It was the cleanest, and there was just something so special about that time I had with you sitting and rocking you. . . praying so many prayers over your sweet life.

And now, here we are. . . you're a beautiful girl, with a beautiful smile, and your personality just lights up a room. You are not in a room very long until everyone knows you are there. You are just a lovable young woman.

Ash, you have no idea how much you mean to me. I remember walking the track in Williamson praying that God would give me a girl. I wanted a little girl so badly. I can even remember praying, "Lord, and if you give me a girl, I'm going to name her after Faye" . . . and that I did, Miss Ashley Faye. I never would have imagined in my best dreams that God would give me a girl as special as you.

You teach me so much my sweet love. Mostly you teach me about loving and giving. . . loving unconditionally without restraints on your heart. You love to the fullest. In fact, you do everything to the fullest. We tease around here and say your philosophy is "Go Big or Go Home" and that is what sums you up, my love. I love how much you love me. I love your Mama's girl heart and how you are always my biggest encourager. No matter what I do you always see me in the best light. I need that. I need you. I need your love. And giving. . . wow what a giver you are. You have no idea how much you teach me about giving. In fact, I would have to say you would have to be the person God has used most in my life to teach me about giving.

And, your heart. . . your heart for the LORD. . . oh, it just makes me say, "Lord, I don't deserve this precious child." To hear you pray is one of the things I love most. To see you bring your Bible with us when we go on vacation makes me more proud than just about anything else you could do. You are a blessing to both your Dad and I.

And, I can't forget your zeal, zest, and love for life. . . truly contagious my love.

And your laugh. . . just makes me giggle like crazy. I don't even have to know what you are laughing about. It's truly one of my favorite sounds.

And your feist. . . girl, although it can exhaust me at times. . . I know this is a gift. . . it is up to you how you use it. Be a peacemaker. Aim for unity. But use that feist for the LORD and the work of his kingdom. He put it in you for a reason, so use it for his glory, my love.

And, sweetie, remain pure. Purity starts in your heart. Don't let the world choke it out of you. You will have to guard purity very carefully. Everything in this world screams for you to give it away. DON'T!!!! Please, please DON'T. It will be one of the most dreadful things you could ever do.

I'm so thankful that you still love your dolls, you can run the soccer field like nobody's business, you have such a warmth about you that makes everyone you meet just smitten over you. I just love how God has formed you and fashioned you. You are a special gift, and I'm so thankful God thought enough of me to allow me to be your mother.

Happy 10th birthday, my love!!! I love you!

With all my love,

Mom

To the Mother of a Fallen Hero

You were on my heart and mind all day today. I just had a hard time getting you off my heart. . . my heavy heart.


There are so many things I've wondered about you . . .



Where were you when you heard the news?



Did you feel as if you were in a bad dream? Did you feel afraid, as if you weren't going to wake up and wishing at every moment this wasn't as real as it was?



Who told you?


Who was with you when you heard?



What were your first thoughts?



What was your last moment with him like?



Do you remember his smell?



Were you afraid when he said he wanted to be a Marine? Did you try to talk him out of enlisting? Did you want to try to talk him out of enlisting?



Do you remember the days when he started to outgrow you?



What do you feel for the man who shot him? Sorrow? Anger? Hatred? Bitterness? Have you prayed for him?For his family?



Do you wake up each day wondering how in the world will you make it the next hour?



Do you know how many tears splattered the black asphalt today for you . . . from people who do not know you. . . from people who did not know your son?



What were your thoughts when you realized our town stopped ticking to honor your son? when the envoy paraded the streets of our town in his honor? when you saw our beloved American flags waving in his honor? I felt so much hope for our country.

As tears flowed uncontrollably down my cheeks, I wondered what my son. . . my son who is outgrowing me. . . what he thought of his mother's tears. He wants to serve his country one day. Although this is very honorable, there is a part of me that really hopes he'll serve his country in another way. . . a way that may not possibly demand his life. . . so very selfish of me. . . yet that is where my heart stands at this moment.

As my children and I got into our car I told them, "We get to go back to our lives as normal. This poor mother will not have a "normal" for a long time, as her son is no longer with her. She will have to develop a "normal" knowing that she see her son again this side of heaven."

Fallen Hero Mom, I have to confess to you. . . I almost missed it. I almost didn't go. I don't know you. I don't know your son. I am a working mom (working 30 hours a week). I am a teaching mom (homeschooling my children), and I've had to handle things for my husband's business. To describe me as "busy" is an understatement. I almost let my schedule dictate my day. I almost let my excuses to not go and honor your son win. I'm so very thankful I didn't!!!

The images of the motorcade will stay filed away in my memory bank. It is truly like something I've never experienced. The tears I have cried for you. . . from one mother's heart to another. . . is something that will stay filed in my heart.

I salute you, mother of a fallen hero, because I know not only did you lose your son, but you lost a part of yourself. . . a part of you died when he died. You are in my thoughts. You are in my prayers. I thank you for raising a young man who wanted to serve his country!

Mama in High Heels, just WHAT have you been doing and WHERE have you been?

Well, well, well now. . . before anyone out there thinks I've totally left blog world and traded her in for Facebook, Twitter, another blog, a good bunch of movies (although the kids and I have watched the entire series of "Anne of Green Gables"), or good books (although I've been up to my ears reading like crazy too). . . I haven't. I've just been . . . well. . . really wanna know?

Okay, okay since you've been on pins and needles wondering everyday where in the world I've been, I'll tell you. . . you know I'm kidding. . . about the being on pins and needles part . . not about telling.

Well, country certainly came to the city when the kids and I decided to go and have lunch with Jon.

First of all I was a nervous wreck driving downtown. Not only that it took me 1-1/2 hours to get 3 miles. . . not because of traffic either. . . just because I'm a dodo brain. . . and yes, I do have a GPS. . . and, yes, it was on. . . and, yes, I do know how to use it. I'm telling ya. . . I'm just a dodo brain!

It took me nearly 20 minutes to park my big ol' car into the tiny parking spaces provided in this parking garage. . . also it cost me $7.50 to park that big 'ol car of mine. The kids and I could have had Taco Bell for that amount!!! That's why I'm a small-town girl, folks!

At one point poor Alec was so tired of me driving around, he told me, "Mom, you're going to have to brave up if we're ever going to park this thing." I was so afraid of hitting someone else's car.

We then entered this big swankified building that my hubby is working in . . .

Check out those gold doors, would ya?

Of course the kids loved the rotating doors. . . Ash kept going around and around. I think the lady at the front desk though we may have been terrorists disguised as rednecks. . .she gave us very suspicious looks when we entered the building.

We met the hubby's boss and those that surrounded his work space, had lunch, then headed to . . .

The Atlanta History Center. . .

The kids' favorite part was learning about the 1996 Olympics and doing some interactive games the reinforced what they were learning.

The little one and I had a rowing competition. That little thing beat me!

Unfortunately, we didn't have time to see everything. . . so a trip will be planned to go back very soon.

Well, Mama in High Heels, is that all you've been doing. . . having lunch in big cities and going to museums?

No sir re. . . I've been strictly enforcing these rules. . .

So much so that on the 1st day of school only Ash could participate in our annual school supply scavenger hunt. .. Alec and Hanna wanted to show themselves. . . so they had to miss out. I was really glad I was the mean teacher/mom . . . because we're in our 3rd week of school now and things are running smoothly.

Now, now, before you go to thinking. . . that's all fine and dandy, but to neglect the blog for those couple of things. . .

Just hold your horses. . . . I'm not finished.

I've been digging through soccer cleats. . . yes, we're one of those soccer families. Thuuu baby is playing this year, so I needed to find her some of her sister's old cleats. Opening day is this Saturday! Whoo-to-the-hoo-to-the-hootie-hoo-hoo. We love soccer around here!

Oh, and another thing . . . I've been meeting my dear friend, Faith, in the mornings to walk and/or run. . . sometimes we get to talking too much and we just walk. . . good with me. . . I enjoy her company and our talks more than I do my running. Look what running has done for her!!!

Just kidding. The girl is a skinnie minnie and doesn't need to shed pounds. She was just being her silly self and I got such a giggle out of her I just had to post this on here.

Bored to tears yet? Well, would you still be bored if I told you we'd been playing on playgrounds at Boy Scout Camps .. .

And. . . hanging out with a whole bunch of river rats. . .

Do these dudes look like a bunch of Templeton's (Charlotte's Web) or what?

These ladies aren't rats or anywhere close to it. . . they are some of my very dearest and closest friends. . . very much God sent.. . and I'm so thankful for them.

We all got together and decided to go tubing down the river one day. SO MUCH FUN!!!! In fact, so much fun afterwards on the spur of the moment we decided to go and have Mexican. Miss Mama in High Heels. . . the one who puts the priss in pot. . . didn't have a change of clothes. . . so I went in my cover up (that I used as a long skirt) and one of Lisa's husbands' T-shirts. . . you know a prisspot loves her friends and enjoys their company if she goes out to eat in the getup I had on that night. I was going to have Jon take a picture. . . but changed my mind!!! I thought someone may try to use it as blackmail . . . hee!hee!

And, of course, I've been listening to some music. . . great music. . . music played by our youth band that Alec plays guitar for. They all played a couple of Sunday nights ago at church. I'm so very thankful for the man who works with them.

Okay, Mama in High Heels, I don't have as much time as this post takes to read, will you please hurry up?!? You know you're pretty long-winded, right?

Yeah, yeah I know. . . well, I've been celebrating the life of this new little one. He happened to be born on the same day my Papa passed away. His mom happens to be a very dear friend of mine. I told her the night of his birth, "A year ago today the LORD took my Papa home. And, today, He breathed breath into a new life." This child will be so special to me just because of the day he was born. Well, and he was born into a family that is super special to me and has been very much God-sent to both Jon and I.

End of the summer pool party. Last week our pool was closing down for the summer. We've had so much fun out there this summer. . . . sometimes we'd have a "Moose schedule" put out on who was going what days, that way we could coordinate. There were only 2 people missing - Faith and Jennifer G!!!! We got some pool time with Faith this summer too. . . but her MIL has a pool, so she didn't feel the need to join another one. We missed her being with us! Jennifer G. has a pool, so she had no need for a pool either.

S-P-L-A-S-H!!!!

Moose Mamas!!!!!

You know one of the things I love so much about these ladies (Faith and Jennifer included) . . . SO MUCH of our conversations center around the LORD. Before this picture was even taken we were talking about things of God. One friend said, "I just praise God we are talking about Him more so than all the things we could be talking about."

Even friends that I've had for a gazillion years (like Lisa) He is what our conversations center around.

We don't really talk about the latest fashions . . .

. . . or the latest weight loss tips. . .

. . . or the latest Hollywood scandal.. . .

. . . or the latest movie playing at the theater. . .

. . . or the latest reality show on TV . . .

Our conversations have substance. Funny thing is I've gotten to a point where when I have "surfacy" conversations with people I walk away feeling very empty. I'm just so very thankful for these ladies and for their walks with Christ. . . and that they choose to share their lives with me and my family.