Frustrating Thursday

The Lord was so very good to me at the beginning of the week. Well, He's been so good to me today. . . everyday. . . but at the beginning of the week I'd gotten some very sweet words of encouragement from friends and Jon, nothing particular or spectacular. . . just a sweet text or a sweet facebook message, or a sweet word at church. I thanked the Lord for sending me that encouragement, and I knew full well I needed to hold onto it.

It's been a rough few weeks. My sister and I really aren't speaking. No need to hash out the details. We each have our perspectives and our "sides" of the story, and each of our perspectives is our very own reality. So, of course, that has been a small dagger in my heart. Forgiveness has abounded, so we'll see how the hurts and wrongs pan out. I actually send her a FB message yesterday, she replied back today, to which I replied. Hopefully as is over and things will resume to normal soon. We'll see.

Then, Alec and Ashley have been fighting like CRAZY!!! I've been so patient, encouraging them each with the Word, listening to each one's struggles with the other. Yet, today I blew my gasket and it went off loudly. I don't think I've blown up like I did today in about two years. Let's just say we all were in tears. Terrible, terrible day. But, I've had it and I'm fed up!!! They now know it. And, of course the terrible mother guilt you feel afterwards is almost unbearable!!!

I also meet with my other "girls" on Thursdays. . . girls in my Sunday School class. I was just so frustrated. . . none of them had done their homework. Soooooo, we had nothing to discuss. One of them is pretty faithful to the Word. One is so-so, and I don't think the other one has even answered one question in her book. It is just such a challenge to get these girls in the Word and the Word in them. They are all very excited at the beginning, but then allow so many other things to steal them away. I had to be pretty tough with them, which I DON'T LIKE AT ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!! I even feared sharing truth in love with them, because that is how the fallout with Melissa happened (well, from my side of the story anyway). But, I knew I had to!!!! I basically told them if we were meeting just to meet and hang out and we aren't trying to grow and become more Christlike then we were wasting everyone's time. I even asked them if they thought it was time to stop meeting. I have a precious girl who has asked me to disciple her. You have to WANT Him!!!! I can't make anyone DESIRE the Lord!!!! Of course, they want to continue meeting and we all brainstormed and offered suggestions as to be better time managers, etc. We'll see how next week goes. Question and please, please answer if you have the slightest inkling of an answer. At what point do you just stop? If the girls aren't in the word, aren't praying, and just want to come and hang out. . . at what point do you say it's time that this ends????? Lydia, a young woman I am discipling told me that her youth pastor (who discipled her) told them they had to take a test every week and if you made below an 80 you could no longer come. He wanted to invest his life in the ones that desired Christ and not just a time of chatting about their problems. Can you sense my frustrations? There is a discipleship conference coming up at our church, and I'm excited to learn more.

However, I'm about to head out and meet some friends for dinner. I can't wait for "girl time". It is so good for the soul. One is my friend, Lisa. . . one of my oldest and dearest friends. It's been so very long for us to hang out and laugh together. . . so I'm off.. . .hoping my frustrations turn into belly-rolling, make your stomach hurt laughter.